I am now seriously concerned that I am going to become addicted to pain killers. All I can think of is that Saved by The Bell episode where Jesse becomes addicted to caffeine pills. I'm going to be like her but worse. That's how these things start isn't it? Pills because you need then and then suddenly, you can't live without them. How will Flynn cope having a drug addicted Mother? I felt like a Jeremy Kyle story waiting to happen. At least you get paid when you go on that show. I'd need the money for my drugs and to support me when I inevitably lost my job through my addiction.
I take painkillers all the time because I'm in pain all the time. Will I be like this forever? I know there is something about taking Ibroprofen and it damaging your gut which is why you eat when you take them.
I tried to decrease them this month as I'm concerned. It turns out it's not that easy. I was still in a lot of pain so have gone back to the maximum dose again. I keep thinking "I can quit at any time" but that is exactly what a drug addict would say!
At one of my many doctors appointment I asked the GP who seemed quite amused by my concern over this. He advised that if I was in pain I should take painkillers and that addiction to these things takes a lot longer than a few months to set in. So I'm going to put my trust in the experts once again.
Fingers crossed for another try next month.
The good news for this month is that I can drive again. I've not been able to as I can't sit normally in the car. I've been sitting on my side as that's the most comfortable position so I haven't been able to sit in the drivers seat and operate the pedals. With Mr T going back to work at the end of January I really needed to be able to drive. I did a quick test around the block and am confident I can control the car and it's not painful. I'm glad I have some independence again plus I can get Flynn around to the places he needs to go.
